Thanksgiving break, the house filled up with extra bodies, including Mace who went there after coming home from school instead of home. Andy and his new boyfriend, Anthony. Ray dropped in and stayed. Jesslyn. Alex had people in and out as well as their little girlfriends.
As they all got home from school or out of school, they filtered in one by one dropping all their belongings by the door. When Jay got home from school, they were waiting for him. There had been discussion about alcohol, basically the fact that there wasn't any to drink since their source had joined the marines.
"Did anyone ask Tavin?" Jay suggested, looking at Julia. All their faces looked back at Jay. "Oh, you want me to ask him. I will. What do we want?"
Julia had a list of demands, which he provided to Tavin when he got him on the phone after his shift. "And Julia says come get her card." Jay told him.
"I'll just come get her." He said.
Julia was waiting for him when he got home, hopping in the car at the curb.
"Hey," She smiled, kissing his cheek.
"Hey, are you drinking too?"
"Do you mind? I won't if you don't-"
"How long's it been, Julia?"
"June." She answered, watching him shift the car into drive. "June 15th." She answered. "Since our weekend."
"Can we have fun not chaos?"
"I think that's a good idea."
"Is Macy here?"
"Yes." She replied. "And Ray and Andy and Anthony and Jess."
"Ray lived to get through the door?"
"Yeah, I'm over that." She answered.
She waited in the car when he went into the liquor store then when he came out he tossed her a tiny bottle of vodka. "This is a little nip. I hope you got more." She said, unscrewing the lid. She drank it down.
"Drink it. I got more." He said, starting the car.
"Aah, I love it." She smiled. "Want some?"
"Not this minute, Red, no."
"Oh, you are driving."
They went to the beer distributor next.
"How much beer did you get?"
"Enough. They go fast." he replied.
"Tav, can we stop at CVS too and then we want taco bell."
"OK. Anywhere else, love of my life?" he asked as they sat in traffic, waiting for the light. Rush hour the day before thanksgiving was oppressive. He hated traffic. All he wanted to do was go home and a beer sounded good, but he couldn't drink too much beer and stay alert.
"That's it." She said.
"What's at CVS?"
"Condoms." She said as he parked.
"For who?"
"Andy and Anthony asked me for them, but whoever..."
Tavin understood the draw to Macy. It took her a while to warm up to Tavin, considering the first time they met he'd been a complete jerk. She was completely cool and collected, a different kid than he'd remembered from June. Macy fit in so easily it was like they had known her longer than they did. She'd come home without a purse full of pills and other drugs.
Having been off drugs and taking whatever her doc prescribed to her, she'd added a good 10 pounds. She carried herself confidently and she still looked amazing. He couldn't get past how pretty this compact female was. Something in her brown eyes or how she smiled. She was put together nice with ample tits popping out the top of her pink shirt and her ass was divine in her yoga pants, but there was something else he couldn't put his finger on with her.
"You seeing anybody, Mace?" Tav asked her when he was getting another beer.
"Regular? No. The best idea for me is to stay single. I don't choose the best relationships." She answered. "She said you would have a problem if we tried getting together. Is that true?" She asked, holding out her cup as he offered more vodka to her.
"Are you asking me if she's allowed?"
"I get the feeling that's what she wants me to do, which is silly." Macy took a drink. "She didn't come out and say it like that. But she's nervous and it's not because of me."
"I know how she is, Macy."
"How is she?" Macy asked softly.
After a 40 minute conversation with Macy, Tavin went for Julia in the living room with the others as they played cards on the floor and listened to music. When Julia folded her hand, Tav picked her up off the floor and took her aside. "Julia, this is gonna sound crazy."
"Ok. What's up?" She asked, sipping her drink. Still sober, but feeling slightly buzzed, she was controlling it, having fun. Tav smelled of beer.
"I get why you like the girl." He said, like he discovered the cure for cancer. "It took me a minute to figure it out, what it was about her that was different."
"Oh, really. Other than the fact she's absolutely beautiful and completely out of my league. And she's a nice person, Tavin."
"She, " he said, pointing at Macy in their kitchen talking to Andy. "She is the female version of Jayson."
"Um, no Tavin." She laughed. "I'm drinking, but I am not drunk enough to believe that shit."
"When you pay attention, you'll notice it."
"Well, he's kind of pretty too." Julia admitted, looking from one to the other.
"How she acts, how she talks, how she carries herself. Julia, you don't see it?"
"Babe, you've known her all of a couple hours."
"She's not out of your league. You're just as pretty."
"You could sound like you believe it when you say it." Julia smiled. "I don't even believe that."
"I'm surprised you're a chubby chaser too." He grinned.
"She's not fat, Tav." Julia whispered, smacking his arm. "Don't you dare say that. She's got amazing curves."
"I'm ok with it." Tavin said.
"I don't think I'll need to get her ready for you. You got this, babe. Have fun." She smiled.
"Me? What about you?"
"Right now? It's kind of early. The kids are all over the place. I'm playing cards." She shrugged.
Now he looked even more confused. "What?" He asked, putting his arms around her waist. She took another drink.
"I fuck her when I'm ready. Trust me, the longer I make her wait for me, the better it is. It's this little thing we do. If you're ready though, go ahead."
"Are you joking?" he asked.
"Tavin, she's worth it. Her body, under those clothes is...there aren't words." She said sternly. She took a drink and kissed him. "Or you can wait for us. Either way, babe. It's up to you."
"Julia, so we're clear. Are you giving me the green light to do whatever I like here, Julia?"
She laughed at him. "Whatever you like, Tav. Do you want me to pinkie swear? Cross my heart?" Tavin dropped his arms from around her waist. "A couple things first, Romeo." He put his arms back around her waist.
"What would that be, love of my life?"
"Well, we use condoms with Macy. She's not on birth control. And don't fucking fall in love."
"Julia, I fell in love with you. I am in love with you."
They took the card game from the floor in the living room to the kitchen table only for more light. Tavin stood at the counter with Macy, still running his mouth. Fuck...he's liking the girl...another one is liking the girl...
Macy had issues too. It wouldn't be long before he figured that out. She was a strong girl, a smart girl, a flirt, had an easy air about her. She knew when to talk and when to listen. The girl had heart, she cared about people and things, had a genuine interest in others, but there was that other side of her. They'd spent so much time together those couple months that Julia learned just about every part of her. Julia called it the dark side and she loved that side of Macy, the vulnerable side, the wounded side. Julia could play with that dark side of hers, use it to her advantage and make the girl crumble. He thought Julia had issues, he had no idea what he was getting into. He would have his hands mighty full if he continued the conversation much longer. She had scars, both internal and external, and she wore them well. She had no choice.
Before Julia had another drink, she took Tatia off the sofa where she'd started to doze and led her upstairs to pajamas and her bed. She flicked on the lamp on her dresser and closed her inside with a kiss good night. She peeked in on Alex next who was laying with girlfriend #4 of the year. These little Mav middle school tramps came and went. His hands pulled from beneath her shirt when Julia pushed the door ajar.
"Hey, You guys need anything?" She asked. "There's still food."
"Get out, Julia." He whined.
"When's she need to be home, Alex? It's like nine."
"Get out, Julia."
"Well, I love you too." Julia said, walking back out of the room. "Jerk," she mumbled heading back to the steps where she met Tavin and Macy on their way up.
"Kid in bed?" He asked, spinning her around and guiding her back up the steps.
"One of 'em." She answered.
Wait till he sees...she thought...as they went in the bedroom. Julia flipped on the ceiling light, which they never used, and set the room bright around them. She closed the blind and pulled the curtains as Tavin met up with Macy in private. Julia stood quietly watching from across the room as they kissed and touched and he petted her. Julia watched Macy react to him, touching him back, fingertips over the arms, across the chest, exploring his muscles with her hands softly. Touching is good, Julia laughed to herself. Macy used to be a hot mess with Chess, totally froze up and submitted. When Tavin started tugging at her shirt, she froze up, guiding his hands upward to her chest. Tavin went back for the shirt and she switched his hands to her ass, which he squeezed hard and rubbed a bit till he went back to the shirt.
Julia went to her and turned her to face Julia, leaving her back to Tavin. "Hey, pretty girl." Julia said softly, taking hold of her waist. More into girls than guys...she didn't fear girls...girls never hurt her...Julia leaned into her and kissed her softly and Macy responded similarly. As they kissed Julia dropped off her heavy bangle bracelets to the floor. One by one off the right wrist and they clinked together on the carpet by her feet. She did the same to the left. She kissed each scarred wrist, then gently lifted her arms above her head. Tavin took the signal and lifted her shirt off. He said nothing, but noticed, his eyes looked surprised and widened a bit, but noticed Julia kissing her wrists, so he did the same and kissed her across the top of her back. He nearly said something but Julia gave him a look that said not to. The scars across Macy's back, healed and raised slits of flesh. She'd obviously had no treatment for any wounds she'd sustained. Julia could sense him assessing Macy with his eyes instead of enjoying the view, so Julia spun her back to face Tavin. He saw the scars on her wrists without the bracelets and he took his time with her, relaxed, not so rushed and hurried.
Tavin started wriggling down her yoga pants, revealing a white lace thong that matched the white lace bra she wore. The pants were easier to get off than the shirt, but she was scarred on her legs too. The front of her thighs, self inflicted? He wondered. They'd healed nicer, weren't as deep. Cuts? he wondered. Once in her bra and panties and having been observed and having gauged his reaction, she eased up a little. Julia whispered in her ear and she started undoing Tavin's jeans, already bare chested in front of her. He had no idea what went on in her past, so when she knelt in front of him to give him head he almost felt bad for her.
Julia leaned over her kneeling Macy as she took Tavin all the way in her mouth, down her throat. "Vodka and condoms." Julia said, walking away from them. He only nodded, enjoying possibly the best blow job he'd ever had.
Julia crept into the hall, pulling the door shut firmly behind her, then went back downstairs. In the kitchen, she looked for Andy and Anthony. "Where's my brother?" Julia asked, picking up her cup and taking back a drink.
"Basement." Jay answered.
Julia pulled the basement door open and yelled downstairs, "Are you two decent?"
"No," They both yelled.
"I need condoms." Julia yelled.
"Come down."
"I don't wanna see." Julia moaned.
"Hey, Julia. What did he say about-" Ray started his question.
"Shut the fuck up, Ray." She snapped. "You don't speak of it."
"Speak of what?" Jay asked.
Julia jogged down the basement steps and got condoms from the box on the bottom step where Andy had set the box. She took 2, which she figured would be enough.
She heard Ray and Jay talking upstairs and she jogged back up the flight of stairs to Ray. "You don't get to talk about her or me. Do you understand me? I am only so forgiving, Ray."
"Ok, Julia. I won't say a word. I swear, Julia." He sounded sincere.
"Don't test me."
"Ok. Fuck. Julia." He said angrily. Julia backed off. "Hey, is it ok if Cassidy comes over?"
"Yeah, fine." Julia said, taking her vodka and going back upstairs. Macy was still giving him head, when she went back inside their room. She handed Macy the condom wrapper, already open and Macy put the condom in her mouth and slid it over Tavin when she took him in her mouth again. She made that look easy thanks to that you tube video she'd watched. Julia could never get the hang of it, but she didn't have much practice either.
"Tav, don't waste the condom on a blow job." Julia warned him, walking to the chair by the window. She set her bottle on the floor and undressed to her underwear. She never wore a bra, she felt as though she had nothing to put in one compared to Macy. She smoked a cigarette and drank as Tavin laid Macy down and went head first between her legs. Julia thought it interesting seeing him from this angle. She drank a quarter of the bottle watching him make love to this amazing beautiful girl, saying the sweetest things to her, things she needed to hear similar but different from the things he told her. She gazed upon him more so than Macy. The way his muscles moved as he moved. The way his waist swerved, how his butt cheeks squeezed with each thrust. He had such a fine body, so smooth and defined. So that's what it looks like...she thought. She used to watch Chess love all over Macy, listened as he told her he loved her and listened as she moaned when he said it. Tavin didn't utter a word about love or adoration, but the sweet pussy line came out of his mouth a few times. He instructed Mace to move beneath him, not pushing her too hard, lifting her and moving her till she got the hang of the way he liked it. She hadn't finished training Macy, but she'd worked on her enough to get her moving a bit and Tavin picked up where she'd left off. Macy was a lot of work for a guy, but she was definitely worth the effort.
"Red, come here." He called, getting up onto his knees, waist still moving in and out of Macy. He looked back at her. "Keep moving," He said, placing his hand on her belly. Her jiggly little pouch...chubby chaser...she thought.
Julia held up the bottle and he nodded. She took it to him and he took a long gulp. That's not water and there's not a lot left...Julia whined to herself selfishly but she knew what he was doing. She put the cap back on the bottle and set it on the floor, taking his hand and letting him guide her onto the bed. She kissed him, absorbing the taste of the vodka from his mouth and on his lips.
"Turn her around." Julia suggested, moving to the top of the bed, easing onto her back, feeling the soft pillows beneath her head. Tavin turned Macy around and watched as she started licking at Julia between her legs. Her divine ass in the air as he entered her again. Once Julia came, he told them to switch spots, taking Julia the same way. Julia started at the top of Macy and worked her way down. He'd never witnessed Julia eating snatch before, but it had to be the hottest thing he'd ever seen. He could watch her all night, getting a better rise out of Macy than he did with his own mouth. She heard him up moving around, leaving the room and then coming back. He laid on the bed beside them and watched as Julia continued to lick her and kiss her, using her fingers, hands, mouth in a personal style that was all her own. Macy was near coming off the bed and loud as she came.
"Where did you learn how to do that?" He asked when she came up for air.
"I dunno." she answered.
"Liar. Where did you learn that?"
"A combination of you and your brother, that's all." She answered, fingers still moving inside Macy.
"I don't do all that."
"Jayson does." She smiled. "Wonder why Jess makes all that noise? Boy's gifted. Like you." She smiled, holding onto his dick and jerking him off.
"You don't have to tell me that. I love you, Red."
"Awe, I love you. So, what do you wanna do next?"
"Just you, Julia. You're my girl. Just you."
A couple hours later, Mace was knocked out. They were both hungry, thirsty and sober. "Any tacos left?" He asked them as they beer ponged on the kitchen table.
Julia handed Tavin 2 beers and looked for tacos, but there weren't any. "No." Julia answered, closing the fridge.
"We ordered pizza." Andy said.
"Good, I'm starving." Tavin said.
Cass gave Julia a hug. "You reek of sex as usual, slut." She said, making a face.
"Hello to you to, Cass." She replied.
She hugged Tavin. "You, too." Cass said.
"Careful or your next." Tavin joked, squeezing her ass.
"No thank you." Cass blushed.
"Where's Ray?"
"With Chess and Jay getting high on the patio."
"Why's he home? He didn't tell me he was coming home."
"I don't think he's mad and it's a fuckin' holiday." Jess said.
"This is not a big deal, Red. Don't worry about it."
"He's got someone with him anyway." Jess said.
"Who?" Julia asked, tensing up. It better not be her...
"Some girl he met in Maryland."
"Oh, ok." Julia said, feeling the tension lift from her.
"Think he brought friends with him this time?" Tavin asked, thinking back to his house being ransacked.
The pizzas arrived and Jess called Chess in for money, which he handed through the door to her. "Is this a tip too?"
"Yes, Jesslyn." He answered.
"You alright?" Tavin asked her quietly.
"I think. Yes." A girlfriend already? He has every right to move on. He has every right to hook up with someone and be happy. He has..."I'll be back. I want some weed." Julia told him, kissing his cheek.
Julia stepped outside and stood with the guys and the girlfriend. "Hi," She said to him. She gave him a hug.
"Hey, Julia." He said. "This is Katie."
"Hi." Julia said to Katie. Katie, huh? Were they all chubby chasers now? She was heavy, but not too heavy. A couple inches taller than Julia, but who wasn't? So she was eye level with Chess. She was a red head too, pale with freckles and a sweet smile. Hazel eyes. Chubby. Pudgy. She looked shy, out of place, nervous.
"Hi, Julia. I heard a lot about you."
"Can I get a hit?" She asked Chess who passed it to her. Julia took a hit and held it. "When did you guys get here? You didn't say you were coming home."
"Tonight." Chess answered.
He's pissed off...Julia thought, taking another hit, then handing it back. The guys head in for more pizza and Chess told Katie to go ahead, that he'd be there in a minute. Here we go...Julia sighed.
"Don't fuck with her head." Chess said.
"Who's head?" Julia asked, feeling the high. "Katie or Macy?"
"Macy." He answered. "Really, Julia? Macy too."
"Oh, I don't remember the part in the divorce papers that said you had custody of Macy." She whispered. "You didn't say you wanted Macy or I woulda left her alone."
"I don't want Mace, Julia." He whispered. "But I know Mace, just treat her right. Where is she?"
"Asleep. Chess, I would never hurt Macy. You can go wake her up if you want."
"I love her, Julia. You know how fragile she is."
"You don't have to tell me that."
"Take care of her."
"Chess, she's fine. She's good. Go talk to her. Of course, I will, Chess."
"Did you tell her about Ray?"
"Absolutely not. And neither will he."
"I'm sorry, Julia. I never thought about it, you two not having a choice. I never thought about it like that."
"You weren't thinking. It's not an issue, so don't worry about it. I'm over it."
"I wanna see Mace."
"Go see her. She's right upstairs. I'll chat with Katie."
"She's nice, Julia."
"Ok. She like girls?" Julia laughed. His face went blank. "I'm kidding, Chess. I'm kidding. Babe, I wouldn't."
"Babe, she'll break your face. She's one of us, don't underestimate her."
"Kidding, Chess. Come on. Let's go in."
"Julia, I love you. I am so sorry." He said, hugging her. She hugged him back.
"I know, babe. I love you too. Chess, just let it go."
"It's our fault."
"It is our fault then. Come on. I don't feel like crying."
He inhaled her. "You smell like her."
"Restrain yourself. I have custody of her this weekend." Julia joked.
Julia grabbed a slice of pizza and started chatting up Katie the chubby marine.
"Where's he going?" Tavin asked.
"To see Macy." She answered, sensing some possessiveness there. "So, Katie. You're one of the few and the proud?" Julia asked, thinking Katie would carry herself more confidently like Chess did.
"No, I'm not." She smiled.
"Chess says you're one of us?"
Katie agreed. "I am, but I am not a marine."
"Where you from, Katie?"
"Maryland." Zombies in Maryland? "I have my own flipside, Julia."
Jay looked at Katie and appeared confused. "Well, welcome to the flipside of the flipside. We should have a lot in common." Julia smiled. "Where is your flipside?"
"Salisbury, Maryland."
"Near Ocean City."
"Not far. You're right."
"How'd you meet, Chess?"
"I work at Quantico. He was there, we met and started talking. After the...well, after, that's where I went. I wanted to be safe. If the wave comes again, I plan on being on base."
"The wave?" Jay asked.
"The infection?" Julia asked.
"If that's what you call it. They hit like a wave. We called it the wave."
"How'd you get back from the flipside, Katie?" Jay asked, moving closer.
"I woke up in an ambulance."
"How'd you die, Katie?" Jay asked.
"I drowned ice skating, fell through the ice. I haven't been back on ice since."
"How'd you get back?" She asked.
"Long story. But we jumped. Figured out how to control the dreams."
Julia answered.
Chess came back downstairs with Tavin's cell in his hand. He handed it to him. "It's Kelly."
"My Kelly?"
"Is there another Kelly?" Chess asked, taking a slice of pizza. "Julia, she's freaking out."
"Why?"
He shrugged, "I don't know."
"Kell, what's up?" Tavin asked, looking at the clock. "I don't think that's a good idea. No. Hold on." Tavin looked at Julia. "She wants to come over. She's already walking."
"Where is she?" Jay asked. "I'll go get her. I'm not drinking."
"No. Kelly. Stop it. We're fine, Kell. Listen, Jay's coming to get you. Calm down."
"Where is she?"
"By the elementary school."
"I'll get her."
Tavin set the phone down on the counter and opened another beer. Julia looked at him. "What?"
"Kelly's spidey senses are tingling." He answered. "She's got the boys with her."
"Why?"
"She's scared."
Tavin's phone rang again. He handed it to Julia. "Hayley."
"I have been trying to get hold of you. Like for an hour. Are you ok?" She yelled.
"Fine. Why? Are you?"
"I got a call from Tavin's psychic middle schooler freaking out. Julia, she's all screaming at me to get out of the fuckin' city."
"Is anything going on there, Hay?"
"Not a damn thing, but she woke us up. Kept saying to get out. Do I need to get out, Julia? She scared me." Hayley calmed a little hearing how calm Julia was. "Why didn't you answer the phone?"
"It's upstairs, probably dead." Julia replied. "She just called Tavin and Jay's going to get her. I'll let you know what she says, but we're fine here."
"Jules, how am I supposed to bug out with Kevin?"
"I don't know, babe."
"He can't run, Julia. I can't carry him. What's the plan?"
"Hayley, babe, you gotta have your own plan. You survived once, you're smart."
"Where are we going this time? Huh?"
"Hay, we are not going anywhere. There's nothing going on. Look around you. Take a deep breath and look around."
"Do I need to leave here? We need to get a head of the traffic on the turnpike. Kev won't survive if we don't."
"No, Hayley."
"Julia, are we dead again? Julia, is this first night? Julia,"
"Put Kevin on the phone."
"Julia, he doesn't know. I'm hiding in the fucking hallway."
"Hold on, Hayley." She looked at Tavin. She looked at Chess. "Where the hell is Jayson? She's batshit crazy."
"I am not batshit crazy and I am not deaf." Hayley hollered through the phone.
"Hay, look, let me have Jay call you as soon as he gets back."
"Why?"
"Cause he can calm you down."
"Should I pack? I'm gonna pack."
"No, you pack too much shit. No. I swear to you on the kids that we are fine and there's nothing going on."
"On the kids, you swear."
"Yes, babe. I will have Jay call you as soon as he gets back with Kell. For right now, don't panic and calm down. You and Kev are fine."
Julia ended the call and set the phone down.
"Where did you live, Katie? How did you survive?"
"With a church group in Frederick, Maryland. We lived in a gated community. It was safe. Went through hell getting there." She looked disturbed as she answered. "Pastor White." Katie said. "He led us."
Julia sat in the chair at the table, the color draining from her face. "New World Covenant." Julia said as shock and awe and fear and sadness coursed through her. The room was closing in around her.
Chess said. "Ring a bell, my Julia?"
"Fuck," She whispered under her breath. "Bullshit. Chess, is this some kind of joke? Are you fucking with me?"
"No." he answered, taking another slice of pizza. He looked at the quiet and morose people in the kitchen. They had no idea who Pastor White was or what the New World Covenant was.
Julia sat, trying to breathe, trying to be calm, trying to rationalize the irrational.
"Who's Pastor White? The new world what?" Tavin asked.
"He married us." Julia said softly. "Chess, I know I wasn't the best wife and I know that I fucked everything up and I know-"
"Julia, I am not fucking with you. Not about this."
"And I know that I pulled some shady shit and I know I had you do stuff that was just wrong and illegal and-"
"I. Am. Not. Messing. With. Your. Head." He stated very slowly.
"I know that I ruined everything cause I was just out there, but this..."
"Julia, I am not lying and I am not screwing with you."
"How much did he pay you to do this, Katie?"
"Julia, I lived it."
"Bullshit. Chess, you hate me this much? Are you even in the marines? Are you? Are we dead? Like Hayley said. Did you kill me all over again? Where's Jayson?"
"Tav, calm her down." Chess said.
"Red, let's go out and look for Jay. Come on. We'll wait for him. He should be back any second."
"Where's Jayson? Is he in on this?"
Julia let Tavin pull her up and take her to the front door where they stepped outside into the cold November night air. "Tavin, am I still dead? Am I still in the coma?"
"Red, come on. Snap out of it."
"How did she know those things, Tav? Personal things, Tav. That church. That Pastor. He married us all on the front porch of the farmhouse. Why would Chess do this?"
"Julia, I don't think they're making this up."
"How does she know?"
"Cause she lived it, just like you and Chess, like Jay and Hayley. She has her story just like you. Come here and calm down." He said, pulling her against him.
"How many others are there?" She asked. "Maybe I didn't bring it back? Maybe this isn't my fault. Tavin, I didn't cause it."
"Red, are you in charge here or not?" Tavin asked, pushing her away from his side. Short of Jayson being there, maybe using a different tactic would work. "Pull it together."
"Of course I am, but we're not ready." She said, a million thoughts churned through her mind all at one time. She calmed herself down. It was difficult to do. "We'll be alright. We are not ready, but we weren't then either. We'll be ok. We'll wait for Jayson and Kelly. We'll go from there."
Julia sat on the steps, eyes searching the darkness, looking for the living and the dead. Shelter...food...water...weapons...sleep...vodka...pot seeds...condoms...medicine...A million little thoughts. She needed a book. Pencils and pens and paper...a map...seeds...animals...solar power...
"Shelter...food...water...weapons...sleep...vodka...pot seeds...condoms...medicine...Pencils and pens and paper...a map...seeds...animals...solar power..."
"What?"
"Shelter. Food. Water. Weapons. Sleep." Her voice monotone. She started shivering. Heat... "Heat!" She said. "It's cold. Shelter. Food. Water. Weapons. Heat. Notebooks and pencils and pens and a paper map."
"Ok. Good. Keep going. You work on that. You wait. Ok?"
"Ok."
Tavin slipped back inside the house and into the kitchen for another slice of pizza and another beer. "She's making a list. She's fine."
"A list of what?" Chess asked.
"Shelter. Food. Water. Weapons. Sleep. Heat. A paper map. Pencils and pens and notebooks."
"Light." Chess added.
"Light. She can add that to her list."
"The list will be long."
Tavin went back to check on her, placing a jacket over her shoulders. "He's been gone too long, Tavin."
"Light." He told her.
"What?"
"Light. Chess said to add light."
"Thought of it." She nodded. Julia pointed down the street. "See that?"
"It's a camper, yes."
"If Kelly says we're bugging out, we're taking that and our shit and we're leaving."
"Julia, I am not stealing someone's RV."
"No one said you'd have to steal it. We go in, get the keys and leave with it. Jay and I will do it."
"That's still stealing the RV, Red."
"Are you running this show or am I?" She demanded.
Oh, she's sounding belligerent. Tavin went back inside. He told them what she was thinking. Tavin had never been so happy to see his brother come home in his life. He'd even started to worry. He and Julia corralled the boys and Kelly through the door. Frankie took Daniel half asleep and half awake and miserable to the upstairs into Alex's room.
"Where is she?" Kelly asked, walking through the living room into the kitchen. She scanned the group of people. "This is our group?" She asked sounding quite annoyed and frazzled. She spied Katie standing by the counter. Kelly went to her and she studied her closely. "She's not lying, Julia. Chess is not messing with you."
"Thank, God."
"And we're not dead. But this one." Kelly eyed Katie skeptically. "She's hiding something. She's...hiding something. There are others aren't there? We're not alone."
"Who is she?" Katie asked, looking around the kitchen.
"Kelly." She answered.
"The closer you got, I could feel you. You are not part of this group." Kelly glared at her. "And the others aren't part of this group. You can't live like that with us."
Julia felt chills as Chess did. "Like what, Kell?"
Kelly touched Katie and Katie pulled away, jerking her arm back.
"We would have ended you. Do you understand? Who brought you here? How did you get here?"
"Chess." Jay said.
"When I touched her, I heard the name White. She's scared, but she thinks she's safe behind the walls, the gates and she's not."
"I'm not safe there?" Katie looked terrified.
"You are safe nowhere."
Kelly put her hands on Katie who was scared enough not to back away. "I won't hurt you." Kelly assured her. "Stay away from the others. Trust no one. You can't live like that anymore." Kelly said, looking inward, her energy traveling through Katie's brain. "The water was freezing cold. I feel panic. There's no air, only water, breathing in water. You cook what they bring to you. At first, you didn't know, did you? You didn't want to admit it. Hunger. Hungry for air, hungry to live." Kelly looked to Julia. "If she stays, she has to earn our trust. Don't trust her yet." Someone had been talking, telling secrets. Kelly could feel it, the desperation. Kelly went to Chess and she touched him. There was a lot in there. Chess let her touch him, but warned her not to run her mouth, "Stay outta my head, Kelly."
"Were you telling our secrets, Chess?" She asked.
"No, Kelly." He denied.
"I wish Julia was here." She whispered, hands squeezing around his.
"Kell, get out of there." He said, feeling her peel away the layer of his brain that held boot camp inside. "Shut up."
"K." She said, moving her hands to his wrist. "I don't wanna die here. Not without..." Chess cut her off, jerking his hands out of her small hands. "There's still time for all that." Kelly told him.
"No, there's not." He shook his head.
She turned away from Chess. "It wasn't him. You've been talking. You remember?" She said, settling on Andy.
"Me?" He asked, looking confused. "Talking about what?"
"Not him, Kelly." Julia said.
Kelly touched him. "Someone's talking. Someone remembers. He's causing problems. Chess said no texting, stay off line. Talk in code."
"How do you-" Chess spoke up, then piped down. "Never mind."
"I know all about you, Chess. I dreamed it. I've been having dreams."
"You could have called. Said something. We're not psychic." Julia said sarcastically.
"Someone else. There's someone else. Who's upstairs?" Kelly said, leaving them. She passed the kids rooms and went into Tavin's room. She approached Macy on the bed. Julia followed her.
"You met her, hung out with her. At the party."
"That's a different girl, Julia. This one is the girl." Kelly unfolded the sheet from her back. "Jesus Christ." Kelly touched Macy's back. She didn't stir, so she gently placed the palm of her hand on Macy's scar tissue. She held her hand out to Julia. "Close your eyes and watch, Julia. Concentrate."
Kelly had a hard time connecting the three. Tiptoeing through Julia's mind was not an easy task. "Of course, you're drunk. Why wouldn't you be?"
Julia concentrated, all she saw at first was darkness. Kelly jumped them into Macy's world.
"I don't want to be here." Julia said.
"I didn't want to be in zombie world, but you dragged my ass there every fucking night. Had me fall in love and then fucked me over. I should leave your ass here." She replied angrily.
The darkness. The utter shame of it all. The wall of women and girls. Bound by their wrists to metal circle brackets on the wall. Kelly saw this life in flashes of fear and desperation. She'd seen near as bad inside the angel's minds. They're nude...they're in pain...they're beaten...they're degraded...they're sold... 'if we don't obey, we die' a girl's voice called. Macy, they saw her as she was removed from the ties that bound her to the wall. She fought, kicking and scratching, like a feral human. Animalistic. "You already know this. You know how this feels." Kelly said. They followed Macy and her carrier to a room, watched as the burly and bearded man made her clean herself, made her wash. He was rough with her, didn't take his eyes off her. She didn't move fast enough, couldn't move fast enough for him. She wept and begged, looking for a way out. He threw a white towel at her and she dried off, covering herself as best she could to keep his eyes off her flesh. She fought the entire way, lacking any force or true energy from the lack of food and water, intentionally withheld to make her weak. She was led to another room, bright and open and held a view of an amazing brightly lit skyline. New York, Julia told her through their connection. She's told us this, Kelly.
Macy stood before a small gathering of men who inspected her, walking around her, looking over her skin and her body. This was three and a half years ago. She escaped. I know this.
Kelly disconnected, feeling Macy rouse from slumber. She was frightened at first, but calmed down when she saw Kelly. She knew Kelly from the party where her boyfriend left with Julia.
"Hi, Kelly." She said sleepily.
"Hi." Kelly said, covering her with the blanket. "Go back to sleep." Kelly smiled, getting off the bed. She left the room and went down the hall to Alex's room. She peeked inside. "It's him." Kelly pointed to the sleeping boy. "It's Alex. He's on line. He's telling our business. People believe him, people with their own stories and he's telling the truth. People are listening."
"Alex?"
"Yes." She whispered, stepping inside the room. She stepped over Daniel and Frankie who slept on the floor beneath a couple blankets. Kelly ran her hand over his face and fluffed his hair. "He knows more than he lets on. He's as aware as I am, especially toward the end. Jayson brought him there, to explain or to make sense of it all for him. Jayson pulled him in and he saw more than he should have. He knows the girls."
"He does. Val and Care."
"The girls remember. He was there long before you became aware, before you came out of your coma. He's talking, people are listening. He's gotta stop." Kelly paused. "Bring him to the table."
"Now?"
"No. Sit him down. Talk to him and-no one talks about it anymore. He's out of control, Julia."
"He doesn't listen to me."
"His mother. Where's his mother?"
"Jail, Kell."
"Not for much longer. Get him under control now before she gets out."
"No, I would rather deal with zombies."
"You'll deal with both." She warned her, stepping back over the sleeping boys.
"When? Tonight? You called Hayley."
"I called her back. That's what took us so long to get here. She was a bit panicked." Kelly said. "The dream, it was like a waking dream. The death dreams, Julia, they're like snippets of premonitions. Slices of what's coming."
"What is coming?"
"They are as close as we are now. They are fast and they are not the same, Julia. It's a different scale altogether."
"Is it my fault?"
"No."
"The dream I had tonight. I took the boys and got out of there. It was a dream where I was awake or it was awake with me. I ran, with nothing. The boys were freaking out. The only way to get them out of the house was fire. I told them it was on fire. I couldn't wake my parents up, they were out, but that was the dream. Once we got outside, Daniel was flipping out and scared. Frankie is used to me going on about stuff like this. I need to show you who I sketched and then I guess Jay can take us home."
"Who'd you sketch?"
"I have no idea who they are. That's it. They're in the premonitions, so if we come across them, we have to keep them close."
When they came back downstairs, Jay looked at them confused. "Are we bugging out? Tavin said we're stealing an RV?"
"No." Julia answered as Kelly pulled a sketch book out of her bag. They opened up the book on the kitchen table and Julia flipped through 10 or so pages of various gory scenes of blood and death, severed heads and body parts. 8 pages of people. On the fourth page, Julia picked up the book and studied the woman closely. She spun the book and dropped it in front of Chess.
"Who's this?" She asked him. Chess looked at the picture, drawn in pencil, short cropped hair, a compact and small frame, Blondie.
"I don't know." He answered.
"That's Blondie, Chess."
Jay and Tavin hovered over Chess staring at the woman that Kelly had sketched. Julia was supposed to keep this woman close, if what Kelly had said was true. She'd assaulted her, knocked her out, taken her weapon. Julia doubted that Blondie would be trusting of her. And she didn't trust the blond either. The sketch was pretty bad ass, crouched stance, holding a gun. She had some sort of helmet on. She looked stronger than in real life, dark background, some kind of warehouse setting.
"You know her, Julia?"
"Last time I saw her she was unconscious."
Julia turned another page. "That's Mark." She said to Tavin. Hmmm, what a weekend that was. Julia touched Kelly and held her hand, 'connect', Julia thought. She intended on revealing Blondie and the fight, but Kelly saw both Blondie and Mark. Mark at the meeting, interacting with Tavin.
"Oh, my. That is him." Kelly thought.
"We were on a break this summer." Julia thought.
"So were we." Kelly replied, flashing scenes of her and Tavin in his car, Kelly giving him road head and other activities in the front seat, her small body wedged between him and the steering wheel. "Your break was better than mine." Kelly thought, observing her and Mark in her small beach room.
"Amateur." Julia snapped at her.
"Pro." Kelly said sarcastically as she searched the Philly files in Julia's memory.
"Don't go there." Julia asked. She could feel Kelly pulling back at the request, but the Pro comment was a dig at her for sure.
Those at the table flipped through the pictures. "This is Ben and Joe. We been together since boot camp." Chess pointed at the picture, one man in the front, center of the sketch and a smaller more squat guy a short distance behind him. Five other sketches still yet to reveal themselves, their worth, their skills.
"Is this group led by men?" Julia asked aloud.
"I'm thinking so, yes. This is a new world." Kelly nodded. "You're not..."
"In charge?"
"There. You're not there."
"Well, where am I?" She asked.
"Not there. I don't feel you there. Or you-" Kelly said, looking at Jayson.
"We don't make it or we don't survive or where are we?" Jay asked, looking at Julia.
"Together. But not there." Kelly said. "It's too far in the future. It's too far, I cant see it yet. I'll know maybe when we're closer."
Kelly took her sketch book back and tucked it in her bag. "I'll go get the boys."
"You can stay. Go home in the morning, Kelly. Don't wake them."
I swear, my next boyfriend is going to be the ugliest fucker alive. So ugly no one else but me will want his ass...Julia thought as she woke to Tavin and Macy having a conversation. She expected them to be a little more close, but they weren't. They were just chatting over Julia's sleeping body. Tavin layon her right and Macy lay curled up against her on the left. They were Macy's arms around her, it was her warmth that she woke up to.
"Good morning," Macy said, kissing her cheek.
"Ugh, what time is it?" Julia moaned, moving closer to Tavin, pulling Macy along with her.
"Like 11." Tavin answered.
"The fucking turkey." Julia moaned, waking up.
"Jayson put it in an hour ago."
"Did he stuff it? I had the directions in my book." Julia asked.
"No idea what he did to it, Red."
"Is everyone still here? Or did they all clear out?"
"I think Alex is the only one here."
"Where's my girl?"
"With Jayson and Jess. They're coming back later with Jess's mom."
"Ok. I have work to do." Julia moaned. Why'd she have to do holidays? Wasn't Ellen cooking? Or Sandy? She ran over a list of things in her head that she had to do. She needed to talk with Alex too. A sit down with no arguments and no attitudes.
"I gotta go home." Macy said. "Daddy already called twice. Gotta go hang out with the fam, meet the new girlfriend."
"Reuben's got a new one, huh?"
"Met her at the gym." Macy replied. "Where else, right?"
Macy crawled out of bed and took her clothes. Tavin watched her walk away and turn left into the bathroom. He couldn't get over the scars on her. When her hair was down, they were barely noticeable.
"Who did that?" He asked under his breath.
"Shh, we'll talk later." Julia hushed him and got out of bed as well. She picked up all of Macy's bangle bracelets from the floor where she'd dropped them the day before. She set them on the end of the bed and when Macy came out of the bathroom, Julia went in. She heard the bracelets clinking as she put them on, heard them conversing back and forth. When Julia stepped out of the bathroom, Alex was in his doorway, looking at Macy down the hall through the bedroom door.
"Hey," Julia said to him. "Can you come downstairs with me? I wanna talk to you."
"Later." He mumbled, staring at Macy's figure.
"Ok, later." She said, moving next to him. "Nice, huh." Julia said, looking at the curves.
"She's hot." He said under his breath.
"She is." She agreed.
"Is she still your girlfriend?" Alex asked her.
"Alex,"
"Is she? I'm not stupid, Julia."
"I-yeah, I guess so. Things can get complicated when you want two things at once."
"Does he want you to choose?"
"I don't think so."
"Who would you choose?" He asked.
"Him."
"Why can't you have them both?"
"It's not that easy, Alex."
"I would choose her." He said, walking away from her.
"Probably for the same reasons." Julia smiled at him as he shut himself inside the bathroom. Julia heard the horn outside as did Macy. She walked the hall to Julia and gave her a kiss goodbye.
"You coming back, Mace."
"I don't know. I'll see you. Love you." She jogged the steps and went out to her dad's car with her bag.
"Julia, come here." Tavin said, seeing her in the hall by Alex's room.
"What's up?" She asked, taking Macy's place next to him.
"You mad she's leaving?"
"No. People come and people go. I'm used to it." She answered.
"I spent more time with her than you did."
"I got all caught up before you even came home from work. Then you let me have what I wanted. I'm happy, Tav." Julia told him, getting back up. She had to get downstairs, get her day moving. "I'd like for you to come down when I talk to Alex."
"Are we going there?"
"Yes, we are." She answered, walking down the hall. She heard movement in Alex's room. #4 was still in there. Where had she been last night? Was she there all night? Had she been that drunk she didn't notice #4?
"Don't you have a holiday to celebrate somewhere?" Julia asked, poking her head around the door at the girl.
"No." She answered. She looked scared to be in the room without Alex.
"Why?"
"I don't like being home is all."
"If you're gonna be here, then quit hiding." Julia snapped at her. "You got clothes on under that blanket?" Julia asked.
"Kind of."
"Are you fucking?" Julia asked her straight out.
"No."
"Don't lie to me. Are you fucking yet?"
"No, Julia." She answered. "We're like 13."
"So what. You're parts work don't they?"
"Oh, yeah." She smiled. Then straightened out, "Yes."
"Put your clothes on."
"Who's in there?" Tavin called down the hall.
Julia looked back at him. "#4." She answered. "What's your name anyway?"
"Julia."
"You're Julia, too?"
"Yes."
"#4's name is Julia, too." Julia called down the hall.
Tavin sat shaking his head, motioning to Julia to get out of his room. Julia left Julia, too in the room and as Alex came out of the bathroom was surprised he wasn't being screamed at. "You can let Julia, too wander the house. We don't bite." Julia told him, stopping on the steps. She looked up at him as he looked over the hand rail at her.
"She's a nice girl." He whispered, sounding kind of disappointed.
"She must be, if you're in there taking care of yourself." She smirked. "Bring her out of the room."
"Ugh," He said, rolling his eyes.
Julia got a call from her dad asking what time she'd be serving her first Thanksgiving meal. He and Ellen were waiting to eat. "Sure, you can come over." Julia cringed. More people. She told them 4 o'clock and wondered where they were all going to eat. Were they cramming in her kitchen? Her kitchen. My kitchen...The realization suddenly hit her, it was her kitchen. She was feeding people, cooking for how many? She had side dishes to whip up and recipes that she'd printed off the internet. She'd sent Tavin to the market with a list and she sat at the counter looking at ingredients. She checked on her turkey, which had started to smell like a cooking bird. She removed the lid and noticed jay had stuffed it. He followed the directions in her book and he'd left her a love letter with the recipe...what a fucking mess I made, love jay. Macaroni and cheese, mashed sweet potatoes with marshmallow melted over top and creamy string beans.
Alex brought Julia, too down stairs and they hung out with her for awhile in the kitchen while she experimented with making a meal fit for consumption. Tavin sat with her in the kitchen and handed off what she needed and helped her out with her directions. They talked about Kelly and her premonitions, they got to the subject of Alex who was stuck on Julia, too in the living room.
"Kelly informed me that your mother will be released soon. When's the last time you saw her?"
"A couple months ago. Me and Jay went on my day off. She's been in for years, Red, so she stopped talking about getting out a long time ago."
"She's eventually coming out."
"Yes, Julia. Eventually. That bothers you."
"Yes, it bothers me, but like I told you, I'm no better than she is. Only I haven't gone to jail."
"I'm not getting into that, Julia. I told you what I think."
"Was Kelly alright this morning?"
"She was. I took them all home and she seemed ok to me. Said she slept better than she did in weeks."
"She was pretty defensive last night, talking about 'our' group."
"Julia, let's not go that far in the future yet."
"What would you like to talk about then, Tav?" She snapped.
"You're awful grumpy. What happened between the bedroom and here?"
She shrugged. "I don't know." She paused. "How about Katie? Can we talk about Katie?"
"She's fat." Tav said. "She's bigger than he is. Nice face though. Kinda shy. He can do better."
"Think he brought her here for other reasons?"
"Definitely. Yes. I think that it has to do with her flipside. I don't get the feeling he's that into her."
"Me either. Maybe they're not together-together."
"Would that bother you, wifey?"
"No."
"My Julia."
"Stop, Tav. Not funny." She frowned.
"I know what it means."
Julia pointed to the recipe. "Next," Drop the subject. Drop every subject. Tavin kept reading to her, step by step. The food was in pans and ready for the oven only 2 hours early. "That's it." She said. "I thought it would take longer." He dropped her note book on the table and her little message from Jay was visible. "Live with it." Julia told him.
"With what?"
"Live with my past. Fucking deal with it. Get over it. Like I do with yours."
"Mine? Mine doesn't just drop by everyday."
"Neither does mine."
"Julia, we're surrounded by them."
"I will not sit and defend myself and the relationships I have had. Not with you, considering you stuck yourself inside one of them last night."
"You said you would not hold that against me."
"No, Jayson said I wouldn't. I am not holding that beautiful girl we shared against you. You can't share one day then call me out on it the next. It doesn't work that way." She was mad, wanted to throw something at him. "You're as big a fuckin' slut as I am so don't go there with me. Don't play that feelings shit with me either cause you don't have them."
"Julia, you're crazy."
"You're problem is you got a taste of what you're missing last night."
"What am I missing?"
"Other pussy."
"That's a bunch of shit and you know it."
"We get bored easy."
"You're bored with my dick now?"
"Like you're not bored with this pussy."
"I'm not."
"Then what are we fighting about? Cause you're not the jealous type. Some 'my Julia' shit. He's hurt. Why do you care?"
"Cause that's mine now." He said, pointing at her.
"I know that and you know that and, believe me, he knows that." She smiled, widening her legs on the stool where she sat by the counter. "What do you wanna do, Tav?" She smiled. He moved on her before she finished the question, knocking half the stuff on the counter to the floor and into the sink. He lifted her up, and as he pushed inside her she left out a little gasp.
"We're still in here." Alex hollered as Julia, too started giggling. Julia said. "Get out. Tav, get out."
"Jesus Christ." He muttered, pulling her off the counter and setting her feet on the floor. "Can't even smash my girl on my own counter in this place." He complained.
"God, I forgot they were there." Julia blushed, walking past them hurriedly.
He pushed her on the bed. "I hate being restricted to the bed, Red." He said, getting on top of her.
"We smash now?" She laughed as he lifted her legs.
"Gonna smash the fuck out of you."
They started arriving for dinner around 3 when Julia started adding her sides into the oven. She started drinking around 3:10. Tavin observed the beer in her hand and approached her. "Red, are you drinking again?"
"Yeah, it's there."
"Do we need a meeting?" he asked, taking it off her.
"There's half a case."
"No."
"I'm fine. Why can't I drink?" She asked, swiping the beer from him.
"The same reason I can't do drugs." He replied.
"What if I promise to only drink on holidays?"
"Do not make a scene."
"Like the scene you made this morning?" Jay asked, taking a beer out of the fridge for Cal. "That was so not cool. Are you two high?"
"We forgot they were there."
"You tell them to come out of their room and do that in front of them?"
"It was an accident." Julia said.
"It was." Tavin agreed. "I can't even screw in my own kitchen."
"What are you screwing in the kitchen for anyway?"
"Why do you always fuck a in bed?" Tavin asked him.
"Guys, stop. Come on, we have people here. Adults and normal people." Jess urged them as she started to feel embarrassed.
"Oh, they know exactly how you are." Jay said.
"Cause he fucks her, Tav."
"That's not nice." Jess said to her. "I don't slut up the turkey dinner, so you make fun of me?"
"Is that what we were doing? Slutting up the dinner you plan on swallowing down your pretty throat?"
"Jules, you know what happens when you drink, put it away. My mom's here."
"Aren't you some kind of angel today? Last night you were drunk on wine coolers with your legs as open as mine were." Julia spat at her.
"Just because your side piece walked out on you doesn't mean you take it out on me."
"She's not my side piece." Julia corrected her.
"She's the main piece and he's the side then? I'm confused."
"Never did lose that jealous streak did you."
"Wanna fuck it out of your system?" Jess asked her.
"Jesslyn, enough. Why do you do this? Let's go, out."
"Maybe she is jealous." Tavin smiled.
"Don't do this." Jay said to all of them. "Girls, it is a fucking holiday." Jayson intervened.
"Typical holiday in the Keller house." Tavin said, taking Cal's beer from Jay. He left the room and started talking with the adults, abandoning the fighting girls with his brother to deal with them.
Jayson took Jess by her shoulders and moved her to Julia. "Here she is. You want her, have her." Jay snatched Jess's phone off her and opened up the photos. "Here," He handed Julia the phone, revealing the pictures she'd sent Tavin over the summer. Julia flipped through the pictures, then looked at Jess. Jay left them alone in the kitchen.
"Julia, I can explain."
"No, you can't." Julia said, deleting her photos off Jess's phone. "You saved my pictures to your phone."
"Jules, I-"
"These were not for you."
"I know, but they're so nice."
"Jess,"
"They weren't for me."
"Excuse me?" She asked. "Who are they for?"
Jess glanced toward Jay. "I like them too, but sometimes-"
"Sometimes what?" Julia asked more than curious.
Jess pushed her into the laundry room. "We look at them while we make love. And it's good, extra good."
"They're not for him either. I stopped teasing and messing with his head a long time ago. But you keep it up? These are private. I thought I got hold of you and they were gone, Jess. I don't want him seeing me like this anymore."
"He likes it though."
"Does he? Cause he never fucks with me on that level anymore. He doesn't even try and you stir it up like a spoon."
"I don't know what to say."
"I have to live with him, Jess." She said. "Jess, do you still want to do it with me?"
"No."
"Do you want me to do it with you two?"
She hesitated, "No."
"Because I can't, Jess." She looked disappointed. "Jess, I loved you a long time ago in a different place. If you want a girl experience you can find one."
"No, I don't."
"You say that, but-"
"I don't want any other girl, Julia."
"Oh."
"I can't-not with Tavin. No."
"I don't want Tavin either."
"Jess, do you wanna fool around?"
"No. Julia, I wish this never happened." She said, taking her phone back and leaving Julia in the laundry room.
Dinner was awkward and quiet. Julia had a few beers and was feeling good after all the Jess drama. The parents carried the conversation with Tavin and Jay, but the rest of them were withdrawn. Julia sat flanked by Jess, who still felt like shit and regretted anything that had happened earlier and Tavin. She was near tears till Julia dumped a wine cooler in her glass, then another. Julia's hand slipped beneath the table and settled on Jess's thigh while she uncomfortably tried to eat with her left hand. Jess looked too cute in her black mini dress and Julia shifted that dress up as her hand explored Jess's private parts. Panties. Dammit. Julia hated wearing them and hated being blocked by them. She leaned to Jess and whispered in her ear.
"Go take them off."
She had never seen Jess move so fast or come back so fast. Julia fingered her horny, jealous and panty-less friend and witnessed someone have the most composed orgasm ever. She rocked her little ass as Julia's fingers rubbed her and didn't make a sound or noise. Instead she had conversation with the parents. As the room emptied out and half the guests moved back to the livingroom, Julia's hand stayed between her legs. Jay filed out with them, but Tavin stayed.
"Another wine cooler, please." Julia said, passing off Jess's glass to him. She leaned back in the chair, fingers continuing their business as Jess relaxed and leaned back as well.
"What are you doing?" He whispered in her ear.
"Fingering Jess." She whispered back. "My hands getting kinda tired. Wanna take over?"
"Serious?" He asked, then thought better of it. "No. No, thanks. Is she?"
"No, she's not." Julia replied.
"Are you gonna fuck her?" He asked.
"Nah. I'm not." Julia answered. Julia handed Jess the glass and watched her take a drink. She pulled her hand away when Jess came. "Hey, go get your boyfriend. Fuck it out, baby girl."
Jess got up and left them sitting in the kitchen in their chairs. Julia put her fingers in her mouth. "Wanna taste her?" She asked Tavin.
He shook his head. "I will not taste the ice cream. I will not eat the ice cream." He replied.
"You are more of a cake kind of guy." Julia smirked at him.
"I think she had a point though, when she said your girl left and you're taking it out on her."
"Macy? I can't have Mace. One of those things I got to live with."
"Red, do you want Macy?"
"I always want Macy." She answered. "Did you ever meet someone that you get along with and you connect with? Someone that leaves you and you still think about every single day and worry about. When you lay awake in the middle of the night with someone on your mind and that person's it. Someone you share shit with and it's understood, no questions. But someone you can lay with and laugh with. Totally chill with both in and out of bed."
"I'm sitting next to her."
"Exactly. That's you. Always has been." Julia said. "So imagine, if only for a second, that you're into guys, and you find those same qualities in a guy. The fucking what?"
"You had that with Jess."
"Then I left her. Yes. And I found it again. With someone who shares everything that I described."
"Oh, well, what does that even mean to us, Julia?"
"Nothing. I choose you. I'm glad you let me see her though." She answered. "Hey, you're not-never mind." She leaned and kissed him on his cheek. Julia got up and started cleaning up from dinner. Julia, too came out and helped her clear the table and do the dishes.
"I'm not what?" Tavin asked, interested in seeing where she was going with Macy in her thoughts. "Julia, too, go on and play with Alex." Julia, too said ok and walked away from them. "I'm not what."
Julia kept quiet and washed the dishes, Tavin stepped up and helped her. "Talk to me." He urged her.
"You won't like what I want to say, Tav. So don't make me." She said. She wiped down the table and set out the pies, one apple and one pumpkin. Vanilla ice cream and whip cream.
"You can tell me anything."
"I know I can tell you anything."
"Sure, whenever you want." He said. "Does she feel the same way?"
"She says so."
"You talked to her about this."
"Because I had to. She had-we had things we needed to clear up-you don't know Macy, Tavin."
"You talked to her, but you won't talk to me."
"She still wants what we had planned and I can't."
"What did you have planned, Julia?"
"This is before you. It has nothing to do with you." Julia told him, reaching for the cigarettes. "Julia, too. Can you cut up and hand out the pies?"
"Sure, Julia one." She smiled, coming into the kitchen.
Julia took Tavin out back and they smoked on the patio. "Me and Chess were going to school with her. I was gonna go to school, too, remember?"
"So."
"We were gonna be together. Like all of us. But things happened and he went his way and I went mine and she went to school."
"Like some weird three sided relationship?"
"Why's it got to be weird, Tavin? I really thought that he'd stay with her. That's why I didn't worry about her and then he didn't."
"Why's it gotta be weird? Did you just ask me that question with a straight face?"
"I thought it had something to do with the drugs, clouding my judgment. But my judgment isn't clouded, hasn't been for months."
"So what are you saying?"
"What do you think I am saying?"
"Are you asking me to be in a three sided relationship with you and Macy? Julia, I don't know her well enough for that. I have known you for years and I am still shocked and awed by you."
"I am not saying that altogether, no. What I would like is for you to get to know her and see where it goes. That's all. Be open to it."
"What exactly do you expect me to do with her? Date her?"
"Do whatever you do when you meet a girl."
"But I love you."
"Ok, then get to know her, so I can have her too. How do I put this? I wanna keep her."
"Here with us? Forever?"
"Just say no, Tavin."
"I'd need to see what she expects too and what, how? Like do we all sleep together? What's the rules here?"
"That's the best part. There are none."
"None?"
"None."
"What if I dig her?"
"Then fucking dig her. Love her like I do."
"You love her? Like for real. Like with me?"
"Tav, I knew when I met you. Without a doubt. I wasted so much time without you. But her? Do I want to waste the same amount of time, however much we have left, without her too? That's all I'm saying, Tavin. I will do whatever you choose. I'm letting you choose. It's whatever you can live with. Not me. I choose you first, before anyone else. Like I said I would. All my roads lead back to you."
"What if I get to know her and I don't like her?"
"You like her so far."
"She's cool, yeah. But that takes time, Julia. A lot of time."
"We got nothing but time."
"She's still here right? When does she leave?" He asked, putting an arm around her shoulders.
"Sunday. She's going back to school."
"Call her. Get her ass back here. I'll hang out with her and we'll go from there. No guarantees, cause it's fucking weird."
Julia laid on the sofa, watching TV. She was half awake and half asleep when Jayson came downstairs and sat on the floor in front of the sofa. He was not in a pleasant mood, which was unusual for him. He handed her a brush and his hair gel. Julia sat up and put her legs over his shoulders and started brushing his long black hair. Having someone else brush and gel and braid his hair was like a massage to a normal person. It relaxed him.
"Julia," He said, his voice tense. He didn't know where to begin. "The pictures...it's exactly what you think it is."
"My pictures give you a boner, Jay."
"And her. So it's-"
"I deleted them."
"Good."
"I still think about you sometimes, especially in the morning after you run and you walk around here all shirtless." She admitted. "But we don't act on it. Even though we could."
"You fingered my girlfriend."
"Your girlfriend wanted me to get her off. She might want another female. Not me. So find her one."
"I'll work on that."
"It'll be fun. You can have new pussy and you never have to see her again."
"Julia part II."
"She's still here. There's a story there."
"Did they see you two? This is like the farmhouse all over again."
"We forgot they were there. The conversation was worse than anything we did. He literally hit it like twice when Alex spoke up."
"In the kitchen."
"Anywhere. Venturing out of the comfort zone never hurt anyone."
"I don't need your advice."
"You sure? You can ask me if you need help-"
"I do not need help."
"I didn't mean it like that. So anyway. Julia, too. He says she's a nice girl. In a good way."
"We needed another Julia here. Like there aren't enough Julia's here."
"She won't last long. Trust me. She's #4. #5 is out there lurking. Alexander is a handsome kid." She put the brush down. "Want all braids or just one?"
"Like 5 pulled into 1."
Julia parted his hair and started braiding his long, thick, black hair. 5 separate braids starting at the scalp and working back to a tail. She loved doing his hair. Hair he usually wouldn't let anyone touch.
"Jay, it's been a long two days."
"I know. How much time do you think we have?"
"I don't know. Where do you think we wind up, Jay? If not with them, then where?"
"We're together, so we'll be alright."
"I got you, babe. Always did and always will."
"Yeah, me too." He said.
"You do know, if it's just us, me and you..."
"Sounds like it will be." He said, cutting her off.
Julia pulled all five braids together into a tail. "If it's just you and me, then what?" He laid his head back in her lap, looking up at her with his big brown eyes.
"I'm going to fuck your brains out."
"You better." He smiled. He looked at the ceiling above them, hearing foot steps on the floor above their heads. "Jules, what are they doing?"
"Same thing we're doing without all the braiding." She answered. Julia smoothed her hands over his head. "I did a pretty good job. I'm outta practice, but they're nice and straight."
"Want me to do you?" He asked.
"It's not wet. It's better if it's wet." She said, pulling her hair down. She moved over him and sat Indian style on the floor in front of him.
"Same way, Jules?"
"Same." She answered.
Alex appeared on the steps, passing them for something to drink. Julia stopped him on his way back upstairs. "Alex, sit down." He hesitated, but Jay told him to sit and he sat on the floor with them.
"Julia, too." Jay began his talk about the girl who still took up space in his room. "Did she move in?"
"No."
"Why is she still here? Don't her parents wonder where she is?"
"No."
"Alex, what's the story here? She seems nice and she doesn't seem like she's abused or-"
"Her parents-" He said, feeling uncomfortable.
"Beat her? Fuck her? Shoot drugs? Hardcore Christians? What? Spit it out."
"They're retarded."
"You called me a retard the other day, Alex." Jay rolled his eyes.
"No, really, they're special. They got in a little trouble and they had to move in with-"
"You mean retarded, retarded." Julia asked. "But she's not-"
"No. She's not."
"Helmet retarded or"
"Irresponsible retarded. They're on assistance and stuff, but they got in some trouble. These people took advantage of them, took their money and they lost their place."
"Alex, really?" Jay asked.
"Really. She don't like talking about this."
"Don't they have someone to watch them?"
"Social workers. Case workers."
"Where are they now?" Julia asked.
Alex shrugged. "Where's she gonna go, Julia?"
"Alex, they gotta be worried about her and-"
"She calls them, they know where she is. I met them. When they get it together, then she can go home."
"We can't keep her here, Alex."
"She's keeping Macy. Why can't I keep Julia, too?"
"You're keeping Macy? What the fuck does that mean?"
"Alex, no. We're not keeping-"
"You're lying to me, Julia. Me and Julia too heard you talking to Tavin outside."
"You were snooping again."
"Julia, too says you have the best fights and she likes being here. What other place will your aunt finger your brother's girl at the dinner table?"
"Alex,"
"That's how you guys are. It always was like that."
"See what you've done, Julia?"
"It's not only Julia. It's all of you. You blame her for all of it. I remember being like 7 and watching you feel up Cass. And at the party, you had sex with Jess and she threw up all over you. None of you are quiet." Alex said.
"Speaking of quiet..." Julia said, trying to change the subject.
"You don't hear anything out of us. Cause there's nothing going on."
"Nothing?" Jay asked
"Well, something." He grinned.
"That's not what I meant, Alex." Julia said. "Who are you talking to online?"
"What's that got to do with Julia, too?"
"Nothing. Kelly was here the other night and she-"
"Awe, Kell's back?"
"Not quite, but there was some stuff going on with her the other night. You know how she gets her feelings."
"Yeah."
"She told us some stuff about you and you've been online talking about our past."
"The doomsday stuff, Julia? It's just online blogs and stuff. Zombie stuff. Nothing real."
"Alex, I think you know what's real and what's not real."
"You have to stop." Jay said to him. "Kelly said stop it. There's people who are listening."
"Like weirdos?"
"Yes, so stop it." She said. She leaned forward and kissed his forehead. "You want to talk about zombies, talk to us."
"Or sex or drugs-"
"Or school or anything. I'm always here, so is he."
"We've done everything you are thinking about doing."
"And stuff you haven't thought of yet."
Julia left Alex go, asking for a list of the blogs and sites he visited in regards to the zoms. She wanted to see for herself what he'd found online.
"Think he'll listen?"
"I don't know." Julia answered, leaning back on him.
"Think he's right about us blaming you for everything?"
"I do sometimes, but other times it's all my fault." Julia answered, feeling his arms go around her shoulders. They sat together listening to Tavin and Macy, their muffled voices, a conversation, then quiet, the soft creaking of the bed above their heads. She pointed up, "That is all my fault."
"Why though?"
"We don't know how much time we have left, Jay. I'm not fucking wasting it."
"It's that simple."
"It's that simple. It's our house, our rules, Jayson. It's how we always lived, Jay. We never gave a fuck. We always lived the way we chose to."
"Then why bother to do anything at all."
"Bills, I guess. I don't wanna be homeless."
"We don't have any."
"He does, so I work for him kind of."
"We divide this up." He argued.
"Some of my work I can't divide up with you."
"Oooooh, so now it feels like work."
"When I don't feel like it and he does, it feels like work. But even then it can turn me on, like the oppression of it all, feeling like some 50's housewife slave with no options."
"You have options, don't feel like you don't."
"I know I do. I can do anything I want. I guess I submit to it. That could change, but Kelly kind of scared me with her nonsense the other night."
"We're going to have to face it again."
"Eh, we'll do it together. Me and you with some shit in a bag and knives in our pockets."
"Where are they, the knives?"
"Everywhere. They're in every room of the house. There's one behind you, under the cushion."
"What if Tatia finds them?"
"She has. I tell her to put them back. She's not a baby anymore."
"Thank God. I never thought we would survive it." Jay said.
"Well, my ass is numb." Julia said, shifting out from under his arms. She stood up, shaking her legs outward, waiting for the feeling to come back as all the nerves tingled and stabbed at her.
"So is mine." He added, moving his ass back on the floor.
"Ooooh, it hurts." She laughed. "I hated that when I was paralyzed. 24/7 with this horrible feeling. No drug worked. Every time it happens it reminds me."
Jay and Julia looked up to the hallway when the bedroom door opened to Tavin's room. Light footsteps on the stairs. Macy went into the kitchen, passing them with a confident smile. A tee shirt and panties. Jay's eyes followed her, leaning to see as she walked past the counter.
"My God," He said under his breath. "Jules,"
"That ass, Jay."
"That ass, Julia." He said, staring.
Mace came back to her with a couple water bottles. Nipples, Jay thought as he eyed her bouncy and perky chest beneath covered in semi-loose cotton. "Love the hair," She smiled, tugging her braids. "Are you coming upstairs soon?"
"Sure, Mace."
"You didn't tell me it could be like that."
"He is very good at what he does, Macy."
She looked down at Jay sitting on the floor. "Awe, you guys match. Could you do that to my hair? It'll give it some body. It's so straight." She said, pushing her glasses up on her nose.
"Sure I can, babe."
"Come up, Julia. He wants you anyway." She said, kissing her cheek. She tread the stairs back to the bedroom.
"What's with the scars on her thighs, Jules?"
"She used to cut. She got some issues." Julia answered.
"I'm going to wake up Jess." He said.
"It was the ass."
"It was that ass. God damn. It's perfect."
Julia extended a hand to him, letting him pull up.
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